I had forgotten how good graham crackers could taste. And Cheerios, and Goldfish, and animal crackers, and every other crunchy, carby kid food.
Until I had a toddler.
It’s not just the flavor, either. It’s the crackly bag, the tantalizing smell, the convenient thereness. Irresistible. And I can’t eat any of it. Not if I want my morning milk, evening chocolate, or, say, lunch.
But it’s hard to turn down tempting treats when you’ve got a two-year-old snack pusher in your household. Sunshine’s not subtle, either. Like my grandmother, her namesake, she’s a high-impact sharer who hates to eat alone. And I’m her preferred dining partner – or at least the most convenient one.
Each time I break out Sunshine’s snacks, she pinches a few in her fidgety fingers and sweetly offers them to me. When I turn her down, she tries again, pushing the crackers against my hands, my mouth. She chants, “Share! Share!” and eats a bite herself, then waves the gnawed-on remains in front of my eyes. After all, if she loves them, then Mommy will, too, right? (Yes. Unfortunately.)
A short quiz, plus a confession: Do you know how hard it is not to share with a two-year-old who wants to snack with you? (Answer: Impossible.) Do you know how hard it is to turn down a Goldfish when its cheddar essence has brushed against your lips and hovered under your nose? (Answer: Even more impossible.) The truth: I want those snacks even more than she wants to feed them to me.
When I am strong, I clench my lips shut, and force myself to smile, and praise Sunshine for being nice. I mentally count my calories, subtracting exercise, adding dinner. How many in a handful of Goldfish? (Answer: 140.) How many in one animal cracker? No, strike that. Three animal crackers? (Because eating just one is the most impossible feat of all. Oh, and by the way? 23.) How many in the Cheerios Sunshine just offered me? (Answer: x times the number of Cheerios, minus y, wherein x is Sunshine’s determination and y is my ability to adhere to my diet.)
When I am weak, which is often, I take the proffered food. Sunshine grins, thrilled with my choice. I chew and mentally praise the goodness of crunchy snacks, trying not to regret them before I’ve even swallowed.
I want Sunshine to share. I want her to be generous and giving. I want her to say, “Yours!” instead of “Mine!” I want her to have a healthy relationship with food, whatever that means.
And, oh, God, I want to eat those Honey Grahams.
I just want not to be a blimp tomorrow.
Life is like this, a constant weighing of good vs. bad, a never-ending list of choices. And, frankly, most are bigger than whether or not to ingest twenty-three calories’ worth of crunchy circus animals. Like which prom dress to wear. Which subject to major in. Which person to marry, which house to buy, which book to write next. When to have children.
So when I do give in to Sunshine’s enthusiastic, pushy-grandma ways, I try to see her goofy smile and not the calories. And I remind myself that, well, at least we’re not choosing colleges. Yet.
This was so sweet. Cherish these days because they pass so quickly!
I do my best! I already look back and am amazed at how fast these last two years have gone.
Oh yes, and yes! When you have a toddler shoving a cracker right under your nose going, “EAT IT MOMMY!” its kind of hard to resist.
Exactly! And, really, they’re only trying to be nice. We want to encourage that. It has nothing to do with how tempting the treat itself looks/smells…
So cute when the little ones want to share, and they really are too adorable to turn down.
So true! And you don’t want to disappoint them, do you?
Such a good post, and it definitely hits home for me. I’ve got a stepdaughter who will be a Senior (in high school) this coming schoolyear and it’s in-my-face testimony to how fast kids grow up. As for the snacks, I’m a bad person to comment on this post…whenever I make my kiddo a snack bag to take somewhere, I make myself one too 🙂
Ha! I confess I very often sneak treats out of Sunshine’s snack containers. It’s practically impossible to open that huge canister of animal crackers and not have a few of my own.
Hope your stepdaughter’s senior year goes well! It’s got to be bittersweet to see her there.
Oh yes, I remember this–he no longer shares at seven, by the way–HA! Looks like animal cracker are your best bet, calorie-wise. 😀 And now goldfish come in so many flavors–my favorite? Vanilla cupcake (WHEN he shares)!
I think you’re right – animal crackers all the way. I was actually kind of surprised when I saw how few calories they really were. I had NO idea how many flavors Goldfish come in. I just grab the huge boxes of whole wheat cheddar ones and leave before I’m tempted to buy too many others. Now, though, I find myself very curious. Vanilla cupcake sounds DELICIOUS.
Catherine is so right. These days of toddlerdom and sharing will be over all too soon.
That’s what I hear! I try to savor these times.
Too cute! Ironically, my kids LOVE the original squared Saltine crackers. No matter what sugary treat is in the house, they’ll go for the crackers. It’s the snack of choice when I’m packing their lunches also. Yes, having children definitely apprises you of all the current goodies on the market 🙂
Cute Sunshine! At the risk of sounding negative, I’d suggest to take a hard read at the ingredient list. When there’s ingredients I can’t pronounce, I break out the real food: cheese, celery, apple.
I picked out the habit after years of intestinal inflammation, and now I feel so much better. And my family has been sharing in my better food habits. They did complain at first, but now, they love it!
Good luck with your weight loss journey!
~Hides the goldfish bag behind her back~ Hi, I’m a snackaholic. I love goldfish, and animal crackers, and pretzels, and trail mix, and granola bars, and popcorn and pretty much anything with peanut butter, and… oh, I’ll stop there. I think I just gained three pounds talking about it. (Have you tried peanut butter on graham crackers? SO good!)
Loved this post, Caryn! My boys have always been really good about sharing with me, too! The problem is, they’re bottomless pits – and so am I! Only they’re growing boys, and I’m not supposed to grow anymore. 🙂
Happy snacking with Sunshine!
So adorable! Enjoy those treats ;)! I love that Sunshine is so eager to share. Amelia is also all about sharing with me in general. I often wind up with Disney stickers stuck to my clothes, neon barrettes in my hair, or plastic bracelets up my wrist. So much fun, and totally cute! I actually wish Amelia would share the other way and eat some of my stuff. She’s a picky kid ;)!