I had a wonderful weekend, full of great company, beautiful weather, delicious food, and gorgeous scenery. But who wants to hear about all that? The best stories are about adversity, not seamless perfection. They also have at least one antagonist — which we’ll get to shortly.
On Friday afternoon we pushed off a muddy shore in southeastern Utah for a three-day rafting trip down a flat section of the Green River. Hubs couldn’t make it, but we had a full crew nonetheless: my parents, my brother, his wife, and her parents as well as a frightening number of provisions, including two rafts, a kayak, forty-eight tortillas (or possibly more), twelve bananas, four cans of bug spray, and a dog. (As you can tell by the number of links in this post, I also packed my camera. But then, that shouldn’t be a surprise. Just click on the links sprinkled throughout this post to see accompanying photos, all of which are mine except the one of the Mineral Bottom road.)
We spent a gorgeous summer afternoon drifting lazily along the river, watching the herons fish, the swallows dive, and the shadows grow longer. We read and chatted and swam. We laughed. We napped in the sun and admired the scenery. In short, it was everything a river trip should be. A freakin’ stereotype. We could have starred in a beer commercial or an REI catalogue.
Until we pulled ashore for a short but much-needed break.
The mosquitoes smelled us coming before we hit the shallows. Within seconds we were stormed by swarms of blood-hungry bugs, all desperate for a drink in a sparsely-populated land. We dug into our bags, searching out DEET, which had little effect on the tiny fiends. It was our first indication that weather, timing, and sheer bad luck had led us into a mosquito infestation of epidemic proportions, the likes of which I can safely say I have never before seen. We did our business quickly, slapping at the bugs while trying to balance, then scurried back to the boats and pushed off, swatting the mosquitoes that followed in our wake.
Night brought us to our doom. We unloaded the boats, made and ate dinner, and set up camp, followed all the while by clouds of insects. My sister-in-law’s mother (my mother-in-law-in-law?) selected a spot for her tent, then asked the rest of us about our evening plans. Since everybody knows that mosquitoes go away at night, my brother, his wife, and her father informed her that we planned to sleep outside. Shaking her head, she set up her tent while we prepared our islands of serenity on a rock slab far from the water’s edge — and, we hoped, far from the accompanying mosquitoes.
As you have probably guessed, this brilliant strategy did not work. The setting sun brought mild relief at best. Only campfire smoke had any effect on the unholy creatures, and we could not leave open flames unchecked while we slept. Instead we used the only armor available to us, swaddling ourselves in clothes and pillows and sleeping bags despite the heat, then bracing for the next attack. It did not take long. This time, however, it came in the form of wind, as a sudden gust ripped my pillow off my head with the force of a camp counselor waking those too tired to face the day without help. My fleece flew off next. Sensing an opening, the tenacious insects dove in under the cover of night, zeroing in on my ears and neck. Despite the wind, which by all rights should have sent the tiny aerialists halfway around the world, they landed on the targeted areas with ease and hunkered down for a nice, long drink.
Invigorated by the snatched pillow incident, I recovered rapidly, again shielding all skin from wind and bugs, tucking in with extra vigilance to protect against my newest enemy: the wind. Only two square inches of skin remained open to the elements, allowing me to breathe. I braced myself against the buzzing as the bugs tried to worm their way inside my armor, and against the breeze as it blew my fleece against my face. And then it happened: a single brave mosquito landed on my lips. Spluttering, I sat up without thought and slapped it away, my carefully arranged protection spilling off around me, all hope of sleep vanishing into the night. I have had my share of adventures and handled them with varying degrees of poise, but I could not, would not sleep like this. Ever. Which left me with two options: insomnia or escape. I made my decision as another hot breeze tore at my hair.
Although I woke my mother-in-law-in-law from a dead sleep, she greeted me cheerfully and ushered me into her tiny abode, a self-proclaimed two-person tent built for one-and-a-half. She cut off my apologies with thanks for making her feel better about her choice of accommodations.
Before we’d even drifted off to sleep, my brother had carried his tent to our end of the field and created shelter of his own in four minutes flat. His wife arrived moments later, tanked up on Benadryl and dragging the rest of their camping supplies.
The next day we rushed through breakfast and the loading of the boats. Terrified at the thought of another night like the one we’d just experienced, we set out to make miles: thirty of them, to be precise. After ten hours of rowing under the desert sun against an upstream wind, we slid into takeout with enough time to sling everything onto the trailer, pile into the cars waiting for us, drive up the legendary Mineral Bottom road, and find a campsite — all well before sunset, thanks to the summer solstice. We feasted in peace on top of a mesa, our mosquito-free existence marred only by a misplaced cactus, a horde of harmless gnats, a stink bug and, for some inexplicable reason, a couple of horses looking for food and attention. But, thank God, there were no mosquitoes.
This afternoon when I got home, I showered off a half dozen alternating layers of bug spray, sunscreen, and grime, then took an iron tablet and dropped into bed. The last thing I remember thinking was, the next time someone warns me about insects when I plan to disappear into the wilderness for a while, I may just listen to them. Though even as I scratch my bites, I still can’t find it in me to regret the trip. Other than the mosquitoes, we had a wonderful time. And as for the little buggers, what doesn’t kill us gives us something to blog about.
My sister-in-law’s leg early on the first evening
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About Me
I am the stay-at-home mother to a toddler nicknamed Sunshine. During nap times I write books, blog, and play around with the photos I've taken. I live in the southwestern U.S. with my husband, daughter, and two cats. My books are represented by Erzsi Deàk of Hen & Ink Literary Studio.
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“Night brought us to our doom.” That line belongs bronzed somewhere.
And sympathies–I’ve had some bad mosquito attacks (this bad though? probably not) and just itch looking at that photo. Sorry the trip wasn’t the halcyon rafting weekend it was supposed to be. But you did get a great story out of it, right? Maybe, kinda sorta?
Poor baby.
OMG Caryn, I totally sympathise with the mossie attacks! Last year my son had a sleepover with a friend, and without telling the parents they decided to sleep in the garden. They live opposite a lake. The following day he was covered with bites – looked like something from a horror movie! And he was off school on antihestimines for the rest of the week too!!
Geez, Caryn. Her leg looks really bad! Incidentally, we have in incredible number of those winged beasts buzzing around our front yard now. They’ve left the greenhouse. Other than the ‘skeeters, looks like you had nice weather for the trip. Your photo of the little beetle is fantastic!
Ahhh….so this is the Year of the Mosquito!! Yikes! I will bring gallons of musk repellent (I read somewhere that worked well) to Canada this summer! Loved the photos. And that was a boatload of bites on your SIL’s leg.Wow!
Those are nasty stings! I suggest mosquito netting, Caryn.
Had to laugh at the line “tanked up on Benadryl.” I used to take this chemo-type drug and they used to inject me with a sh*t-load of Benedryl before each treatment to stave off an allergic reaction. That needle hadn’t even left my arm before I was asleep and drooling! OUT! LOL!
The last time I went camping, it was mosquito hell by day, insane racoons by night. NOT peaceful. BUT . . . still fun.
E
Oh my, that just looks so painful… But glad the mosquitos didn’t ruin the otherwise perfect trip!
Omg. As if the story wasn’t bad enough, you have a picture! I used to love camping. Then I grew up and the enticement of smores just wasn’t enough to combat the bugs and dirt.
Thanks, Pam. I was afraid it was a little melodramatic.
As for mosquito attacks, I’ve NEVER had one even close to this bad, and I’ve done a lot of camping.
Oh, Christina! Your poor son. I bet he’s more careful about mosquitoes now, though!
Katie, that’s why I had to have a picture of her leg. Even then I was thinking it might provide some good illustration. And, yes, it was a wonderful trip otherwise.
Yeah, Barrie, that’s what I’ve been hearing. That’s how it is out here, at least. And good to know about the musk repellent. I’ll have to keep that in mind for next time.
Oh, David, if only I had known! Next time, though. A few people on the trip had hats with mosquito netting hanging down over their faces. I was very jealous.
Erica, Benadryl is some good stuff if you want to sleep and stop itching from mosquito bites at the same time. I had a lot of it onboard, too, and once I was away from the mosquitoes I slept very deeply. And raccoons? Yeah, those would be distracting.
Thanks, Z! Me, too.
Tink, I can see how the bugs and dirt would bother a lot of people. If camping were always this buggy, I probably wouldn’t do it as much either. But then, if we all liked to camp, all those nice hotel owners and the people who work for them would be jobless, wouldn’t they?
I hate bug bites…and I am somehow constantly the receiver of dozens more than anyone in my outdoorsy party…lame! Glad you still had a fab trip!
xox
You’ve reminded me of why I do my camping in a hotel.
I don’t know about your region, but here in Western New York we have the threat of West Nile Virus, so the health peeps are always reminding people to do whatever possible to keep the skeets away, like no standing water, including old tires, buckets, the bird bath, etc.
I’m one of the luckier ones – I don’t attract skeeters (or so my hubby the mosquito target tells me).
i’m impressed that you don’t regret the trip. must’ve been great company! seems that some people do attract them more than others – i’m one of the lucky ones they seem to LOVE — one year while camping, my counselors counted over 100 bites on my back alone. and i’m thinking, that’s just not fair! i’m glad the mosquitoes left you with enough blood in your body to make it back alive.
also, i love the horse picture. he’s so random, just wandering around the equipment.
And this is why I don’t camp. Though I do admire your outdoorsy, pioneering spirit!
Heidikins, I’m with you on that one; they are so annoying. And I really don’t understand the purpose of the mosquito. Is it really necessary for them to be quite that obnoxious? I don’t think so.
Emily, other than the bugs it really was a great trip. I definitely want to do it again, but probably at a different time of year, and not during a giant mosquito outbreak. And you have my sympathies on the mosquito bites during camp. That sounds awful! As for the horse picture, I admit that every time I look at it I can’t help but grin because it looks so ridiculous.
Alyson, other than the bugs it’s so much fun! I highly recommend it.
Well, I’m still itching and after looking at the picture of my leg, I don’t feel so wimpy for the bit of complaining I’ve done. Minus the attack of the mosquitoes and the heat, the trip was amazing. I love the links to your other photos; the scenery was spectacular and you certainly captured our handsome dog well.
Leg Owner, I don’t know about you, but I dosed myself with Benadryl yet again last night to get rid of the itching. It helped, and boy did I sleep well! Thanks for reading it and commenting.
Oh my god, I would have died. I HATE any and all bugs. I would have been in that tent WAY sooner than that! Just thinking about it… *shudders*
I haven’t been camping since I was a boyscout (ie, about TEN years ago!). It was actually a canoe (sp?) trip, which I actually enjoyed (save for the actual CAMPING part… I just liked being on the river!). Haven’t had much to do with nature since then.
My idea of camping is a hotel with running water and no mosquitos. I’m glad you had fun despite the adventures of the wilderness.
And THAT is why I will never go camping. *G*
All those bites…OMG. You’ve just given me another reason (not that I needed more
to never go camping again. Plus, my son gets an allergic reaction to mosquito bites–they blister then pop–which, after he got only 3 bites earlier this month, required a 10-day dose of antibiotics…so we are seriously NOT a Wilderness Family.
Your Mineral Bottom Road photo, however, was especially lovely.
Kyle, I’m just counting my blessings that there weren’t any black widows, scorpions, or rattlesnakes. At least mosquitoes are preferable to those.
Thanks, Dru! And, yeah, I’ve known to enjoy a hotel myself sometimes.
LOL, Bookmom! You are missing out, though. I’d recommend giving it a try sometime. Just not during a mosquito infestation!
Oh, Marilyn, your poor son! Even when you’re not camping you still get mosquito bites, so that’s awful. As for the Mineral Bottom one, I wish I’d taken it. However, all M.B. photos I took were on my mother-in-law-in-law’s camera because she wanted to have it documented and I was in the front seat while she was in the back. Until she gets back home and sends them to me, I won’t have any of mine.
My goodness!!! That is quite and adventure…lots of fun and then some painful itching going on, too!! You Poor thing!!! hope you heal soon!!!
Run, run for your life. Those look like the flying tiger sort of mosquito bites. http://www.bentpage.wordpress.com.
That one picture of your sister-in-law’s leg tells the whole story. OUCH!
What a great picture of our grandpuppy!
You forgot to mention the incredible stars both evenings! It was so great to sit around the campfire with family and see the Milky Way. The stars alone made it worth the bug bites—well, almost! I’m still scratching!
BTW, you didn’t mention that the horse in the picture seemed to particularly like you, Caryn!
Thanks, Merrianne! I hope so, too. The Benadryl is helping a lot. It’s also ensuring that I have some pretty good nights of sleep!
LOL, Daniel! Yes, they were definitely scary.
Larramie, that’s why I took it that first evening. Even then I was thinking I might blog about it. Then things got worse and I *knew* I would.
Glad to see you posted your very first comment, Mom! And, yes, you have a very handsome grandpuppy. I agree — the stars were amazing, as was the moon. And, yeah, the horse. I’m still laughing about that one. I will never again click my tongue at an unknown horse lest it invade my personal space repeatedly the way that one did. It sure was pretty, though.
ouch
Oh my, Caryn! This reminds me of a week-long camping trip we took to St. John one year…I was the family member designated to feed all the mosquitoes. Went through a bottle of Cutters per day! And NOTHING is worse than being all bundled up, hot as blue blazes because you can’t let even one millimeter of skin be left to the bloodthirsty bugs…and then you hear that little whining sound buzzing around your ear. Ewww! I’m impressed that you all still say it was a good trip. That’s the survival spirit!!!
ooooh her leg looks so bad. Great story and the shot of the dog in his/her life vest was my favorite. Your story confirmed for me that I am not meant for camping- unless one considers a Holiday Inn a camp.
Ergh. Remember: even if you pack some repellent, it wears off from sweat. Re-apply in a couple of hours or so, otherwise, it seems like you had a good time.
And THAT is why I will never go camping. *G*
argh. her poor legs! i always…always..get bitten by mosquitoes. a friend recently told me that B-Complex vitamins help and i started taking them and it does seems to be working! (so there’s my tip of the day!)
Yikes. Her leg reminds me of a time in high school. Boyfriend, woods, and mosquitos. Urgh.
Mr. Dakota — very true.
Sandi, I LOVE that phrasing — I was the family member designated to feed all the mosquitoes. So apt.
Thanks, Eileen. And camping is definitely worth it, if you’re careful about where you go. I’ve never even had a shadow of this problem before.
Ted, you better believe we were reapplying like crazy. And it did help some, although not much. They were pretty determined. There were so many of them and not enough mammals, so they had to eat or starve to death.
LOL, Siir. That’s too bad.
Joanne, I have some B-Complex vitamins at home. You better believe I’m going to start popping them. As soon as I can find them…Thanks for the tip!
Keri, that does NOT sound like fun. Though I do find myself a bit curious about the situation.
This post made me cringe and scratch. Mosquitos LOVE me–and I’m somewhat allergic to the bites as a result of my legs sometimes looking like your sister-in-laws! Only now the bites swell to golf-ball size. Makes me itch just thinking about it!
This is why I don’t do anything that remotely resembles camping. Anything in the camping family (i.e. rafting, hiking, canoeing, etc.) and with no air conditioning is something I will never do for fun.
I can’t believe that picture!
Oh my goodness, Caryn you made out with a mosquito! Have some restraint, honestly. =P
I’m glad you had such a memorable and beautiful trip. The picture were very pleasant eye candy for me today.
That looks almost like poison ivy, there’s so many. Except the bumps are much more huge! Makes me shudder to think of it!
the same thing happens to me when i get bitten–hate hate hate mosquitoes!
This is why I don’t camp. Too much Nature.
Though I think it’s very brave of you to do it. I’m in awe.
And here I just posted about wanting to go on a river-rafting expedition… Did not consider the possibility of mosquitos. Yikes! Glad you made it back with a little blood still pumping in your veins.
I tagged you, if you’re interested!
It’s because you’re so sweet you know!
What an adventure! Oh my gosh. I would have died. The hubs and I were in Algonquin Park with our then 2-year-old son and decided to go for a hike. We wore the hats with the nets and were covered with clothing from head to toe. Unfortunately, we proceeded to get lost. I of course with a 2-year-old started freaking out. Luckily we found our way back to the hotel, but I guess being out so long gave the mosquitos time to bite through my clothing. Yep. I was covered. Just me. Lucky me.
I hope all your family is feeling better!
Caryn, mosquitos are the biggest pests in the universe, hands down. I’ve been on similiar camping trips, and nothing like bites all over your face to make ya feel outdoorsy-cute. When you wrote you got bit on the lip, I thought uh, oh! But, I bet it was lovely during the daylight. And aren’t the little buggers annoying when they buzz close to your ears??
LOL, Erin! When you put it that way, it sounds really dirty, and not in any West Nile sort of way!
Alyssa, GO on your rafting trip! Seriously! It’s well worth it. Just time it better than we did.
Oh, Robin, that’s so scary! Glad you made it out okay.
LaDonna, the buzzing is awful, because you know what’s coming but it’s so hard to prevent it.
I’m itchy. So very, very itchy. *walks away scratching legs*
Godzilla’s teeth! Those are some vicious suckers…
I’m worried about the provisional dog, BTW. Was he eaten?